• My Spouse Has A Gambling Problem
• I Think My Wife Has A Gambling Problem
• My Wife Has A Gambling Problem

Updated September 04, 2017 16:45:46

I'm a gambling addict. Three years ago, I was convicted of white collar fraud, after I stole over $130,000 from my employer to fuel an insatiable addiction.

My poison of choice was not poker machines, but online gambling. Racing, the thoroughbreds, the trots, the dogs — I wasn't fussy, so long as I could get a bet on and fuel that addiction. Partner has gambling problem. Green sceneries, opulent scenery and beautiful ancient monuments of most times compelled site visitors around the globe to guide their cheap flights to Accra and find out the beauties at Accra.Most favourite and appealing places can you manifest your ex back into your life that are considered to be the must watch places with Accra are usually Kwame Nkrumah. For people with gambling problems a small provocation, like walking past a gambling hall or having money, can be enough reason to go gambling. Once they start, it is hard to stop. Let the person know that you are prepared to help and to talk about the difficulties, but be clear that the consequences of the gambling are for him or her.

My poison of choice was not poker machines, but online gambling.

Racing, the thoroughbreds, the trots, the dogs — I wasn't fussy, so long as I could get a bet on and fuel that addiction.

The bets would range anywhere between $5,000 and $20,000 a day. I would bet until 3:00am, try to sleep for three hours and bet again for another three hours on online racing in the United States.

I always thought the stereotypical gambling addict was a working-class middle-aged man or woman, sitting at their local club, feeding their favourite pokies machine four or five nights a week.

But I rarely ventured into the local TAB.

Betting while the kids were in the bath

At the zenith of my addiction, I was married with two beautiful young children and working as a finance manager at a local council.

When I was with my family, I was physically there — but mentally, I was miles away, thinking about gambling: when I could next bet, where would the money come from, whether I could back a winner.

I thought about gambling 24/7. I placed bets at home, at work, the shops — basically everywhere and anywhere I could get reception on my phone.

I would be walking with the kids and our dog, yet I'd still be trying to place bets. I would even bet and watch the races on the phone while the kids were in the bath.

A knock at the door

I had been thinking about stealing to solve some of my debt problems for months, but I couldn't do it because I knew the consequences would be dire.

Then one evening, I had a visit from two large men with a baseball bat, strongly suggesting it would be in my best interests to repay a sizable debt that was due that week.

They punched me and threatened to use the baseball bat 'next time'.

I was left bruised and battered from their warning. It was a seriously scary moment; I still occasionally have flashbacks and it sends chills through my body.

That night, I made the decision to steal from work. I felt physically sick and fidgety; my mind wouldn't stop racing. I knew it was wrong, but I did it — knowing I could one day get caught.

The first time is without a doubt the hardest — but once you've done it, stealing becomes easier.

Listen to the program

Earshot meets Leigh, an online gambling addict.

I had nothing to lose. That's how I 'reasoned' it.

However, stealing became another problem to add to my list.

I was constantly worried about being caught. When someone knocked on my office door, when I got a phone call, when my boss called me to a meeting, I was never quite sure.

The fear was slowly killing me, but I couldn't confess, couldn't turn back. I was on a knife-edge with no solution, no way out.

It was a Monday morning when I was finally caught. I was called into the CEO's office and they presented me with the overwhelming evidence.

I was caught red-handed, but I still denied it. I knew my career was over and that jail was not far away.

But at that stage, I had a small sense of relief. No more looking over my back. The lying and deceitfulness could stop.

On the inside

When I was caught and sentenced to jail, the gambling addicts I met in the prison system had similar stories to mine. They were middle-aged, smart, well-educated men from good upbringings, all addicts to racing and not the pokies — certainly not the stereotypical gambling addicts I had imagined.

My addiction cost me everything. I lost my job, all my material possessions including house, car, everything I owned.

But that pales into insignificance to the lost relationships.

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My marriage disintegrated, I lost access to my children, I don't talk to my family and I'm no longer on speaking terms with most of my friends. I don't blame them.

During my year in jail, I had enough time to reflect on all the damage it had caused and when I was to be released I knew I couldn't go back to that lifestyle.

You get far too much time to reflect in jail. I was constantly thinking about the kids, but I didn't decide to quit gambling because of them. The constant stress and 24/7 of thinking about gambling had destroyed me: physically, emotionally, and financially.

I knew if I didn't stop gambling it would kill me.

Get help before it's too late

I write this not because I find it a cathartic experience, but because I hope that it helps others to seek help before it's too late. Or for family and friends of addicts to intervene and offer support.

My Spouse Has A Gambling Problem

For people 'on the edge' or thinking about committing fraud, the solution is simple: get help.

Seek support before you hit rock bottom. The help that suited me the most was from my psychologist, one-on-one extended chats — but for others it may be Gamblers Anonymous.

For the family and friends of addicts: please don't give up on them, it's a horrendous disease and they need all the support you can give.

Life in 2017 is certainly not perfect, but it's a damn sight better than it has been.

I've got regular access to my children, I'm rebuilding lost relationships, I've found some temporary work — and I haven't had a bet since 2014.

Topics:gambling, internet-culture, family-and-children, fraud-and-corporate-crime, law-crime-and-justice, australia

First posted September 04, 2017 12:14:41

A life ruined by gambling is not a great life. You will have a lot of pieces to pick up. It will take time from you, as well as money, in addition to robbing you of all of the joy that you have in your life.
Gambling addiction is a horrible silent addiction that can become progressively worse. If you or someone you love has a gambling problem, an effort to stop gambling should start as soon as possible.
A severe gambling problem is usually progressive, and can become worse over time if not stopped. Slots gambling addiction, pokies, video lottery terminals (VLTs), and other forms of gambling are usually the worst forms of gambling. Many can become addicted in a very short period of time, and the financial losses can be devastating to say the least.
Gambling addiction can affect the gambler and his or her family in many ways. This addiction causes social problems, emotional problems, physical problems, psychological problems, occupational problems, family problems, and of course, financial devastation.
Problem gambling does not only affect the gambler and the family of the gambler, but can have consequences on employers of the gambler as well. Many have embezzled money to finance their gambling habit and have put companies in financial distress.
When you hear about people going to jail for a gambling addiction, it is usually a result of stealing or embezzling from ones' employer or even stealing from family members and friends.
Here are 5 reasons why gambling addiction can ruin your life and why you need to stop gambling now:

1. Gambling addiction can cause you to lose your friends and family very easily. Many divorces are caused by a gambling addiction and result from untreated addiction. A gambling problem creates tremendous social isolation since gambling seems to become the most important thing.
2. An untreated and severe gambling problem can cause the worst anxiety and depression which leads to an incredible sense of despair. This despair can lead to gambling related suicides which are not uncommon. Gambling addiction has the highest suicide rate of all addictions, hands down.

3. This addiction can cause a lack of functioning in all areas of life, including work. Many people have lost their jobs as a result of a gambling problem. This can compound the financial devastation already experienced from the addiction itself.
4. Compulsive gambling can become all encompassing. The physical health of the gambler can deteriorate rapidly. If you are struggling with this addiction yourself, you may not be eating right, exercising, visiting a doctor, or taking care of your teeth. These physical problems can truly take a serious toll on health and the neglect of the body can result in very serious consequences.

5. Financial ruin is a direct result of this addiction and gambling debts can become so huge and insurmountable that bankruptcy seems to be the only option. Debt from gambling can also result in foreclosures, loss of savings, retirement accounts, and maxed out credit cards. The financial fallout of a gambling addiction can last long past the time that the addiction stops.

I Think My Wife Has A Gambling Problem

These 5 reasons why untreated gambling disorders are just a few of the reasons why you or your loved one should stop gambling and return to a better, healthier way of life.

My Wife Has A Gambling Problem

It is hoped that this article was helpful to you, and that you will do whatever it takes to get better. You will truly be happier when you stop gambling. You will have a better outlook, and more than anything, you will have hope again.